Miami Prices Are So Insane Even Millionaires Are Getting Priced Out

Miami’s median home price hit $675K & even millionaires are getting priced out. A local’s honest take on the cost of living crisis in the 305.

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Listen, I’m not gonna lie to you—I just saw a report that the median home price in Miami hit $675K and I literally spit out my cafecito. Brother, I remember when that kind of money could buy you a whole building in Kendall. Now it gets you a two-bedroom condo with a view of the parking lot and HOA fees that cost more than my first car.

But here’s where it gets absolutely wild.

When Being Rich Isn’t Rich Enough

You know Miami has officially lost its mind when even millionaires are getting priced out. I’m talking about people with actual millions in the bank looking at Indian Creek Island prices and being like “nah, I’m good.” There are billionaires moving in and literally pushing millionaires out. Millionaires! The people we used to think were set for life are now getting gentrified by people who own small countries.

That’s not a flex for Miami—that’s a horror story with palm trees.

I work in Brickell, right? Every day I watch these new glass towers go up faster than you can say “luxury waterfront living,” and every single one of them has the same pitch: exclusivity, world-class amenities, starting at only $2 million. STARTING. My guy, “only $2 million” is an insane sentence. That’s not a price, that’s a ransom.

The Math Stopped Mathing

Real talk, the math in this city doesn’t make sense anymore. You’re telling me I need to make six figures just to afford a one-bedroom in Coconut Grove? A place that used to be chill and artsy is now “if you have to ask the price, you can’t afford to park here.” And don’t even get me started on Wynwood. Artists built that neighborhood from nothing, and now they can’t even afford to rent a studio there. How does that work?

I’ve got friends who’ve lived here their whole lives—born at Jackson Memorial, went to school in Doral, work solid jobs—and they’re looking at moving to Broward or Homestead just to have a shot at owning something. That’s not growth, that’s displacement with a skyline view.

And the wild part? Everyone acts like this is normal. Like it’s a badge of honor that Miami is “expensive now.” Bro, when your barista needs three roommates and a side hustle just to live within an hour of work, that’s not success—that’s a crisis wearing designer sunglasses.

We Built Different (And Priced Accordingly)

Look, I love this city. I love the energy, the culture, the fact that you can get a cortadito at 2am and watch the sunrise over Biscayne. I love that we’re a world-class city now, that we’ve got Messi playing soccer in our backyard and Art Basel making Wynwood look like a gallery every December. I’m proud of all that.

But pride doesn’t pay rent.

And when the people who actually make Miami what it is—the chefs, the artists, the teachers, the hotel workers, the people who keep this city running—can’t afford to live here anymore, what exactly are we building? A playground for billionaires who fly in twice a year? That’s not Miami. That’s just expensive real estate with good weather.

I’m watching my city become a place where being successful isn’t enough. Where making good money isn’t enough. Where even having millions isn’t enough. And honestly? That should worry all of us.

The 305 We’re Losing

I’m not saying Miami shouldn’t grow. I’m not saying we should stay stuck in 2005. But there’s got to be a middle ground between “affordable for locals” and “billionaires only.” Because right now, we’re creating a city where the people who built it can’t afford to stay in it.

And that’s the most un-Miami thing I can think of.

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Welcome to Miami, where even the millionaires are checking Zillow in Fort Lauderdale.